


How Unreasonable

by noahmiles413



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Caring Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion Has Feelings, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Requited Unrequited Love, Sharing a Bed, TW for typical hanahaki stuff (difficulty breathing/coughing/chest pain/blood), no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:55:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25415011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noahmiles413/pseuds/noahmiles413
Summary: He realized he was fucked when Geralt made an off-hand comment about a young couple being “unreasonably affectionate” and looking annoyed at their existence (by then, Jaskier had learned to differentiate Geralt’s annoyed expressions to some degree.) It was then that Jaskier vowed he would never tell Geralt about his feelings, lest he be sent away.At the time, he’d had no idea how that vow would come back to bite him in the ass.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 19
Kudos: 144





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> god this took so long to write. but there's so few hanahaki fics in this fandom and I'm a simp for not-actually-unrequited-love so,,,,
> 
> the title and the lyrics from jaskier's song are from Fair by The Amazing Devil, because I'm also a simp for TAD, and Fair makes me cry because it's so cute

When Jaskier realized he loved Geralt, they were sitting at their campfire, eating Geralt’s god-awful rabbit stew. It was when Jaskier had the thought that he’d rather be sitting with Geralt in the cold and damp, eating unseasoned rabbit, than warm and comfortable with the best food he’d ever had, but with any other person, that it really fell into place for him.

He realized he was fucked when Geralt made an off-hand comment about a young couple being “unreasonably affectionate” and looking annoyed at their existence (by then, Jaskier had learned to differentiate Geralt’s annoyed expressions to some degree.) It was then that Jaskier vowed he would never tell Geralt about his feelings, lest he be sent away.

At the time, he’d had no idea how that vow would come back to bite him in the ass.

\----

Jaskier was walking a couple of paces behind Geralt, attempting to work out the melody for a new song. It was proving to be rather difficult, as he couldn’t exactly sing it out loud; the lyrics were entirely about his feelings for Geralt, and there were enough specifics that he was sure to discern their meaning.

_It’s not fair, it’s not fair how much I love you  
It’s not fair  
‘Cause you make me…_

Jaskier groaned in frustration and put his lute back over his shoulder. He was getting nowhere, and he needed to be fresh enough to perform in the town they were supposed to arrive at that night. 

They arrived in the town just after noon, so Geralt headed directly to the notice board to check for contracts. The only posting seemed more suitable for a mage than a witcher, but he noted the name anyway. They really were running low on coin. 

“So, what have we today, my dear witcher?” Jaskier inquired.

“Somebody’s hexing the young women.”

“Oh, what kind of hex?”

“Read the notice for yourself,” Geralt replied gruffly.

“Oh, a love hex! How interesting. I do hope this one goes well, it should make quite a song,” Jaskier said.

“Hmm.”

After speaking with the town magistrate, they set off toward the woods where the hexed young women had been returning from.

“It would be nice,” Jaskier huffed, “if these troublesome mages could live on a nice road. Or even along a well-travelled path. But I suppose then they mightn’t be quite so troublesome.”

Geralt said nothing, placing his hand on Jaskier’s hip to steady him when he stumbled on a stone. Jaskier tried not to think about the warmth of his hand.

When they arrived at the mage’s door, Jaskier hesitated. A sorceress obsessed with love hexes? With his feelings for Geralt? He snuck a glance at the other man, who was double-checking his equipment.

“You know what Geralt? I’m a tad tired from that hike, I think I’ll sit this one out-” He was cut off by a voice.

“Ah, guests! Do come in.”

Geralt glared warily.

“Like I was saying, I’ll just wait outside. So, uh, good luck.”

“You too, bard,” The voice called out, and Jaskier felt a pressure pushing him inside.

“Alright, I suppose I’ll come in.”

The inside of the mage’s home was quite nice, aside from the overwhelming smell of roses. The scent was so strong that he could taste it; he had no clue how Geralt seemed so unfazed, with his heightened sense of smell.

They found the sorceress in a large sitting room, standing in front of a fireplace. She had long, dark hair and green eyes, and a crown of roses adorned her head. Her cream gown brushed the floor as she turned to look at them.

“Welcome. I do enjoy having visitors.”

“I’d gathered that. You were being rather pushy.” Jaskier retorted.

The mage took a tray off of a table in the corner. On it was two cups of rosy liquid, and as she brought the tray closer the scent of roses got somehow stronger, twisted with the smell of something that was uniquely Geralt. The pit in his stomach deepened.

“Care for a drink? I seem to recall you were feeling quite worn out from your travels.”

“Ah, no thanks,” Jaskier said quickly.

“I’d prefer not to drink a love potion.” Geralt said. “I assume that’s what you’ve been giving those girls?”

The mage sighed and set the tray down. “Straight to the point it is.”

“Why would you go to the trouble of charming all those girls?” Jaskier asked.

“Every time I go to town I’m hounded by men, clamouring for my attention, calling me the most distasteful of names. I figured it was time for a taste of their own.” She rolled her eyes. “And now I suppose they’ve sent you to dispose of me.”

“There will be no disposal necessary, as long as you stop.” Geralt growled.

“So forceful. Alright, I’ll stop- if you give me something in return. A truth.” She said with a smirk.

“Fuck off.”

“What truth?” Jaskier asked nervously. The pit in his stomach was rapidly turning into a great ravine.

“A truth of love.” The smile was still on her face.

“What game are you playing at, mage?”

The sorceress looked offended. “There is no game; truths are valuable. I believe the bard here has a truth that is quite valuable indeed.” Jaskier felt the blood drain from his face, as though it had all fallen into the ravine in his gut. He laughed nervously.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“No, no. None of that,” she said, and Jaskier felt the same pressure from before, but this time at his throat. “Go on.” His lips were moving against his behest.

“I'm in love with-” Jaskier clapped a hand over his mouth and clenched his jaw. Geralt pulled out his sword.

“Stop this, now.”

“Must things devolve so slowly into threats?” The sorceress’s eyes flashed. Jaskier was rapidly growing dizzier. “Unless you’d like to give a truth of your own?” Jaskier fell over. Geralt lunged.

The mage threw him back in a wave of magic. Geralt charged forward again. Jaskier watched blearily from the floor as swords met force. He’d just regained feeling in his toes when Geralt was knocked onto his back. The sorceress stood over him, her hand outstretched. She was cutting off his air supply.

“How dare you attack me-” Geralt’s lips began turning blue. Jaskier gathered his strength and took the dagger out of his belt. He launched himself at the sorceress and stabbed her in the back. She screamed in pain. Red stained the back of her dress.

“You’ll pay for that.” And the pressure was back, this time in Jaskier’s chest. “You could not tell a simple truth. Until you do, you will feel every ounce of pain you have caused me, and it will choke the life out of your miserable body.” 

Jaskier groaned. The pain was unbearable. When he came to, the mage was gone and Geralt was standing over him, with already-yellowing bruises on his throat.

“Jaskier? Jaskier, are you alright?”  
“Yes- yes, I’m okay, aside from a pain in my chest.”

“Good.” Geralt helped him up, and they made their way back into town, Jaskier leaning heavily on Geralt the whole way. 

_How unreasonably in love I am with everything you do_  
_I'll spend my days so close to you cos if I'm  
Standing here maybe everyone will think I'm alright_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go lads

They’d just reached the inn when Jaskier felt a tickle in his throat. He coughed, trying to get rid of the sensation; however, it didn’t go away. He tried to ignore it. 

Geralt booked them a room at the inn, while Jaskier did his best to remain upright. He didn’t know why he was so dizzy- the mage hadn’t even touched him. Maybe it was a side effect from whatever spell she’d used to make him speak, or perhaps he’d hit his head when he passed out.

Either way, Geralt had to help him stagger up the stairs to their room. He tried not to think about the way Geralt’s arm wrapped around his waist, because for some reason it made his chest hurt and head spin even more than they already were.

“It’s a shame that I’m so dizzy,” Jaskier said, as Geralt sat him on the bed, “I was looking forward to playing tonight.”

“Hmm.” Geralt began looking through his pack. “What did that mage say to you?”

“I’m not sure, something about telling the truth and feeling pain.” He said and coughed lightly.

“Probably some kind of curse. We’ll have to see a proper mage if that dizziness keeps up.” Geralt said and groaned in pain as he stood up. He passed a waterskin to Jaskier. 

Jaskier took a sip, then asked, “are you alright?”

“I’m fine. I’ll go get us some food.”

Jaskier sat back against the headboard. He had better get an amazing song out of this whole ordeal. At least he had Geralt there, he thought, kicking off his boots and pulling the stiff sheets over himself. Geralt was being very patient and caring with him. Gods, he was so gone for that man.

_It's what my heart just yearns to say  
In ways that can't be said  
It's what my rotting bones will sing  
When the rest of me is dead_

He felt another twinge in his chest, another tickle in his throat. He tried his best to clear it away and mulled over the sorceress’s words. Whatever she’d cursed him with clearly had to do with his feelings for Geralt. He took another sip of water and sighed. Hopefully, another mage would be able to clear it up.

The door creaked as Geralt came back in with their dinner. They ate together in near silence, with Jaskier on the bed and Geralt on the floor. Geralt kept grunting in pain and shifting around when he thought Jaskier wasn’t paying attention.

The reason for Geralt’s discomfort became clear when he got changed for the night; his entire back was covered in bruises, presumably from being thrown against the ground and walls by the mage. Jaskier gasped.

“Oh, my dear witcher, that looks horrible.”

“I’m fine.” Geralt said and winced as he pulled his new shirt over his head. He moved to take his bedroll.

“Absolutely not, Geralt, you’re not sleeping on the floor with your back like that!”

“It’s not the floor, it’s my bedroll. And you’re not sleeping on the floor either, you can barely walk.” He growled.

“Aha! You admit that it is the floor!” Jaskier crowed. “Anyway, we can both sleep on the bed. It’s not like we haven’t shared one before.”

Geralt looked at him dubiously. They had shared a bed before, but only when it was much larger and there was room for them to stay to either side. 

Jaskier patted the blankets. “Come on, I’m tired and I won’t sleep until you come lay down.”

Geralt sighed, snuffed out the candle, and laid down next to Jaskier. The bed really was much softer than his bedroll.

“Goodnight, Geralt.”

“Goodnight, Jaskier.”

Jaskier wakes up once in the middle of the night and finds Geralt’s arm around him, their fingers linked together. His lips curled into a contented smile, and his chest ached horribly.

Quite predictably, Geralt is gone when Jaskier wakes up in the morning. He sat up and squinted at the sun streaming through the curtains- he’d slept in quite late. His dizziness had subsided considerably.

As he was getting dressed, he felt that awful tickle in his throat. He coughed, trying to clear his throat- and felt something at his lips. He spat into a handkerchief and had to put a hand to the wall to steady himself when he drew it away from his mouth.

Inside the handkerchief sat a single bright white gladiolus petal.

Jaskier cried out in shock. He stood, staring at the petal until Geralt opened the door. Jaskier crushed the petal in his hand and slipped it into his pocket. For some reason, he just couldn't let Geralt see it.

“Ah, Jaskier, you’re awake.”

“Yes, I was just about to have breakfast. Or, lunch, I suppose. Whatever’s closer.” He rambled nervously.

“I got the money from the magistrate. We’ll continue on after your meal.”

“Alright.”

Jaskier kept trying to make a song about the sorceress as they walked, but somehow, it kept slipping into his feelings for Geralt.

_She charmed the town without remorse  
And threw us down with a magic force  
She drew the words out of my lips  
As my love on the floor, she grips  
And choked him ‘til he’s hoarse_

Well. That wouldn’t do.

Jaskier refused to give up. If his hands refused to play anything that wasn’t about Geralt, then he would work on his love song.

_It's not fair, it's not fair how much I love you  
It's not fair cos you make me ache you bastard  
And she'll say  
Oh how, oh how unreasonable  
How unreasonably in love I am with everything you do_

He plucked his lute and hummed until a coughing fit overtook him, and discreetly dropped the petals behind them when Geralt took the lead.

He hoped they found another mage soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided I'm not changing the pronouns for the song, so you can tell which character is which. In my mind, Jaskier is "he" in the song and Geralt is "she", because of the relationship dynamic, but interpret it how you like :)
> 
> also I wrote the other lyrics that aren't from fair, please don't roast me on them ;-;

**Author's Note:**

> spare kudos and comments for a poor writer,,,,


End file.
